Ok, I suppose after 12 hours of playing South Park: The Fractured But Whole (ha!) that a Gentleman should really take a break and write a review for White Buffalo DC.
This game is a masterpiece- sweet, sad, intricately detailed and uproariously hilarious. It’s like an entire new season of the show that you get to take part in, a mock Marvel Civil War storyline that in typical Matt & Trey fashion goes on to explore deeper topics of gender identity, inherent racism in police practices, and a cause near & dear, cannabis legalization.
The fight with Sober Towlie in his Medicinal Fried Chicken dispensary demonstrates a very strong knowledge of the legal weed experience, from the indica/sativa discussion with the budtender that precedes it to Towlie calling out for a topical as you light his ass on fire.
And when you beat him, he hooks you up with some extra Grandaddy Purp shatter! This is the most fun I’ve had playing a video game in years and thanks to Initiative 71, I only need to stop playing long enough to open the door for my gift delivery from White Buffalo.
White Buffalo also appears at many of the District’s cannabis events. The cool thing about their menu is that it features gifts from some other top brands, like caviar joints from Elevators.
A lot of folks are calling these moon sticks now, short for moon rock sticks, but I like caviar joint cuz it sounds Classi. Potato, potatoe, it’s a joint made from flower coated in oil and rolled in kief (sometimes folks add hash, too).
Smoking one of these is a favorite indulgence for when I want to feel like a fancy man. I picked up one of these Elevators a month ago for funzies and it had a very enjoyable, clean flavor to it.
Some disreputable companies will use caviar joints and moon rocks as an opportunity to bundle poor quality materials in a way you won’t notice as easily, but Elevators are clearly using fresh ingredients in their brain-salads.
But this review is in fact for White Buffalo’s house wax and flower. Your Gentleman was gifted samples both of their Platinum OG flower and Purple Kush wax to tell y’all about.
The Purple Kush impressed me. It’s got a softly sweet and floral nose to it, which you don’t necessarily expect from a darker concentrate. It’s goopy, so you might need to stick it in the freezer to scrape the bit stuck to the plastic container, but I got most of it out fine. The flavor is a bit harsh but not too bad for trim-run. What really got to me about the Purple Kush was the effect.
See, smoking flowers and dabbing throughout the day, which I do to manage my anxiety and depression, has the side effect of increasing my general threshold for pain. I don’t notice little aches and scrapes so much. My tolerance is such, though, that I usually get little relief from my acute muscle pains/spasms by ingesting THC heavy weed.
White Buffalo’s Purple Kush wax was one of the exceptions, a mind-melty buzz that also significantly relaxed the ball of neuronic hate mail wadded up in my hip. This was a very welcome discovery!
White Buffalo’s Platinum OG flower was nice. The first time I smoked a couple bowls, I was ready for bed in the next twenty minutes, and again on the next.
After that I built a little tolerance to this cannabinoid profile and I can stay up, though I prefer it right before bed anyway since it’s both mentally and physically sedative. The fresh, hefty nugs have beautiful trichome coverage, but the nose is a pungent mix of dirt and sweaty feet that didn’t leave my grinder for days.
You can find White Buffalo on Instagram to arrange gift delivery or to find out what events they’ll be making appearances. Oh, almost forgot! Subscribe to my newsletter right here, pretty please. I’ll send one out just as soon as I beat this game.